Friday, July 3, 2009

After attending the Transformers movie last week, it brought up some issues that I have...not with the movie, but with the public in I have compiled a nice and neat little blog to rant about it. They are things that I think must go. Enjoy.

1. I think the most obnoxious thing in the whole world is when you are watching a movie and the people next to you cannot keep their mouth shut. They giggle, they laugh obnoxiously, and I miss critical moments of Megan Fox...I mean the movie...And then they have the nerve to shoosh people! Seriously! If you want to talk during a movie, go pee or something. I'm sure the porcelain gods would LOVE to hear about your boyfriend.

2. I also greatly dislike when people say 'That band/movie/book sucks." Really. Isn't it fascinating that record companies pour money in to these bands, not to mention book publishers and movie companies trying to finance something they believe is of value to the general public. It's fine if you don't like something, but if it's on the airwaves or the big screen, obviously it means other people do. A great example of this is the band Nickelback. You love em or you hate em. That's all well and good...but to say they suck when they've sold millions of albums is rather naive, don't you think?

3. There is a very annoying habit among the general public in regards to my profession...The minute anyone learns that I am a massage therapist, they do the whole "Really? Well, my shoulder has really been hurting..." and they leave it hanging as the rub it and lean closer. If you know someone who is a massage therapist, don't do this! It's not funny; it's not cute. It's extremely irritating and working on you becomes the last thing we want to do. We spend all day working on people, enjoying the flow of cash as we do it. We also tend to be pretty giving people. However, when you do this, you might as well tell me to clean your bathroom while I'm at it. Maybe you can hire a monkey to put up with your shenanigans.

4. Dishwashers that don't actually do anything but spit a little water on your dishes have to go. We have had trouble with ours since we moved in to our apartment and have instead opted to wash by hand...then it becomes difficult to want to do them due to the soap that somehow gets everywhere, wrinkly hands that smell funny, smelly water, and trying to find a dish towel somewhere in the cupboards...Sad I know, but I've lived here for about 2 years and I still can't find them!

5. Finally, the sick voice must go. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the sick voice, it is pretty easy to recognize. Have you ever met those people who any time they 'get sick' , elevate their vocal range to that of a boy going through puberty? That high, airy sounding voice that always includes a sigh that sounds like Santa died? If you really don't know what I'm talking about, you need to get out more. I might as well be a hermit and I hear it EVERYWHERE.

Thank you. I feel a little better.

1 comment:

  1. Oh Steve, how I miss our group/class conversations at school. Your #3 rant made me smile, as I think about the people at church gagging a little when I tell them how much it will cost to "fix" that shoulder. (you & I both know they are thinking to themselves; "it's not free?") haha. Keep up the good work!